Thoughts and Reflections about Tommy.

August 20,2009
Today marks the one year anniversary of Tommy’s passing. I thought I would write a post about my thoughts and reflections of Tommy’s life.

Here is a video that Rene aka Tommys Mommy made about Tommy’s life.



When I first started talking to Rene I was captivated by Tommy. He was so adorable and so strong. I learned about Tommy’s health problems and I learned about Congenital Heart Defects. I didn’t even know it existed until I started talking to Rene. I instantly fell in love with Tommy. His smile was one of those that could make your heart melt. I felt a bond with Rene and Tommy from day one. It could have been that Tommy was only a couple weeks younger than Noah but I think it was something more. I honestly think that Tommy was put on this Earth to inspire and educate. He touched so many lives and now through his story and spirit will touch many more. Tommy’s memory will live on forever.

Tommy was special not because he was medically fragile but because he had a purpose and was so determined to survive. I think that people spend their whole lives doing the good things that Tommy did in his 23 months on this Earth. Tommy was a happy little boy and loved to flirt with the nurses. He was a celebrity to them. He had such bright eyes and a radiant smile. I carefully followed every moment of Tommy’s life from the time that he was 10 months old. I laughed at the silly videos that Rene posted. I smiled when he would do something sweet or anytime I saw his little face. I would cry tears of joy when he made progress. I cried those tears of joy when I saw the video of him saying Mama, when he got his trach out and when he attempted to eat the blue water.

Rene was and still is great about answering my questions about Tommy and the health issues he had. She taught me so much. Sometimes I felt like I was asking her a really stupid question. She would always answer and explain everything to me. I am by no means a doctor.

One day when Tommy was in the hospital I got an idea to make him a Get Well poster. I wanted something big and bold that he could study and enjoy looking at. I made him a Thomas the train. Still to this day, I have no clue how I was able to do that. See, since I am left handed I am naturally a horrible cutter. I did it free handed. I didn’t use any stencils or trace anything. I was really proud of it. It turned out really awesome. A Thomas for a Thomas Rene said to me shortly after I sent it to her. I would have done anything for him. Just to see him smile.
Tommy’s life was full of ups and downs. There were Good days and bad days. I know that Rene would never trade them away and that she keeps them all close to her in her heart.

I remember a year ago when I found out Tommy was gone. I remember that I was sitting on my bed on the computer and there was an urgent update on his Care page. I was just washed with worry. She hardly ever updated marked urgent. As soon as I saw the email I logged in to his care page and read the news. I just sat there for a moment reading the words. It took a minute to process and then I just felt a flood of tears. I was bawling so hard. I hadn’t cried that hard in a long time. I didn’t think I was ever going to stop. I think I cried until I had no more tears. I woke up all kinds of people. I went in to Noah’s room just to love on him. I needed my little boy. I also woke up my mom and told her what happened. Then I texted a friend of mine that knows Rene and Tommy and she called me and I told her about what happened. I am not sure how she understood anything I said because I was crying so hard. That was a very sad very painful next few days.

It felt like some horrible nightmare that I couldn’t wake up from. You know when you are dreaming and you aren’t sure if you are. Then something out of place happens that you know couldn’t possibly happen? I was waiting for that moment. I wanted to wake up. I wanted to hear that Tommy was ok. But sadly it was not a dream and he was gone. I spent those few days looking back at Rene’s blog reading thru the posts of his short life. She documented almost everything. I couldn’t look in to his eyes without crying. I was wishing that it wasn’t true. I really miss Tommy. He was a great little boy.

When I went to visit Rene as I mentioned before we went to Tommy’s grave. It was so emotional and real to me. I hadn’t been so it hit me like a ton of bricks. I just stared at the place where he is buried. I know that the part of Tommy that we all love isn’t in the ground. That part of Tommy is in Heaven. He is dancing and singing and laughing with a perfect heart and no scars or signs of a trach.

I am raising awareness for Congenital Heart Defects any way I can. I am helping Rene get Tommy’s story out there. I am helping educate people about CHD. I created a memorial page on Facebook for Tommy. Today is Bubbles for Tommy and I will be out there with my son blowing bubbles for him. Anytime I see bubbles I think of Tommy. I believe that the bubbles are floating to Heaven for him to play with.
I will have a wonderfully exciting post coming up soon so stay tuned.

The Wipes Bandit!

I love my son with every fiber of my being but he has turned in to swiper when it comes to wipes. He will take the wipes from the box and mess up their perfect little factory pressed and folded sheets. Then turn them in to crinkled waded up little balls. Occasionally he rips them up. It drives me bananas. I know I can still use the wipes if I catch it close to the attack. I also know I can just re wet them if they dry out. BUT it is such a pain. I tried to tell him not to do it. That didn’t work. It’s not like he doesn't have any toys. Trust me he has a ton of them. I have been putting the box of wipes on the shelf in the closet out of his reach. Sometimes I just forget! I’m human right? I can forget to put the wipes up.

Now that he is in a toddler bed he has free reign of his room. His room is baby proofed. It just irks me. It’s not the container he wants to play with it is the wipes. He likes to clean his trains and trucks with them. I will give him a couple to use sometimes. Hey it could be worse.... He could have done what I did when I was about his age.

I was two or three years old and I was playing with my best friend at the time. We were in her room. I am assuming we snuck away some how. Then, I had an idea. Well it wasn’t really an idea per say but just something that looked fun. There it was in all its glory a big white container of Johnson’s Baby Powder. It was calling out to me saying play with me, smell me, come on it will be fun. How could I resist? How could anyone resist? So I got it down from the changing table assuming that is where it was. I picked it up and started squeezing and shaking it. I am sure I was laughing so hard. We (really I) left not a speck of baby powder in the bottle. The whole room was painted white in baby powder. My best friend and I were completely covered head to toe in it. It was in our hair it was EVERYWHERE! It was snowing baby powder. I have a picture of it somewhere. Our moms took pictures and talked about it for years. I am surprised we didn’t end up with breathing problems after inhaling all the baby powder in the air. This is why the baby powder I have is up high in the linen closet so Noah doesn’t follow in my footsteps.

So I guess I can be thankful that he didn’t do that.

Binaca Review and Giveaway ------ 5 winners!

I had the opportunity to try out some different Binaca products. The products I tried are Binaca Fastblast and Binaca Breath Freshener Aerosol Spray. Binaca is made by Dr. Fresh and it is a breath freshening spray that has been around for 75 years. However they reinvented the products.These are not the same products you remember. They aren’t the old drops where you had to shake them out on your tongue to handily counteract stale or bad breath. They don’t have a medicine taste. They work instantly. They are small so they fit in your purse or your pocket so you never miss an opportunity to steal a kiss with the one you love. They are amazing quality from a name that you trust. Not only is it a great product, it also has great value. It has more sprays per bottle than products from Listerine.

There are two different kinds of Binaca. Both come in great flavors.

First there is the Binaca Fastblast which is a small non-aerosol pump bottle. It easily fits in a purse or a pocket. It comes in Peppermint and the brand new Cinnamint. Every bottle of the Fastblast has 300 spritzes. It costs $2.49 which is excellent value! It also comes in mini size which contains 150 spritzes and costs $1.00. For those who like to have a back up. You can get the twin Binaca Fast Blast pack which contains 600 spritzes total for $3.49.

The second is the Bianca Aerosol Breath Freshener that comes in Spearmint or Peppermint for unmatched cooling and freshening your breath. It comes in a svelte, lipstick style package. My son took the unopened package the day I received it off the bar in my kitchen and thought it was a battery for his fire truck. He even attempted to put it on the bottom of his fire truck. It contains 150 sprays per spray bottle. The price of the aerosol breath freshener is $1.99. It comes in a triple pack as well. Think you could share it with the whole family for $3.59.

You could put Bianca in Christmas stockings, Easter baskets, in care packages and even send it along with your college student when they go back to school. I can’t believe how inexpensive these products are! You can have great smelling fresh breath with out spending tons of money.

Bianca is available at Walgreens, most major food, drug and mass market retailers nationwide.

My favorite was definitely the Cinnamint. It tasted great. It made my breath smell fresh and took any bad tastes out of my mouth. It defiantly did the job. All of the flavors taste so good. I was a little worried that it would have tasted like medicine but it didn’t. I thought that I would put it to the Ultimate test.
On Sunday, My mom, Noah and I went to the mall for a while. On the way home I wanted White Castle. I only eat White Castle like once or twice a year. My mom hates the smell of White Castle. She hates it so much that the windows in the car were down and she was plugging her nose. I ended up eating it outside so she wouldn’t have to smell it anymore. I thought I would try out my Binaca on something with a really strong bad odor. I squirted the Cinnamint in my mouth twice and then forced my mom to smell my breath. Instantly the lingering taste of White Castles had disappeared and so had the smell. It didn’t even mask the smell it was completely gone. It is like it vanished because it didn’t return later. It didn’t leave a bad taste in my mouth either like other products do.You know when you go an take a drink and it tastes horrible? That is not the case with Binaca. It tastes really good. It had been like I never ate the White Castles. So what are you waiting for? Go get some Binaca today. Your sweetie will thank you.

Thank you to Binaca for letting me have the opportunity to try their wonderful products.
I was given the opportunity to review this product because of my membership at The Product Review Place. http://productreviewplace.ning.com/

Now for the Giveaway!

There will be FIVE (5) winners. Each winner will receive 4 assorted Binaca products.
Mandatory Entry: Go here and click on Fresh facts and tell me one of the Fresh Facts. They are all really funny and interesting.

You must do the mandatory comment in order for the additional entries to count.

As always please remember to put your email address in each of your comments or make it available in your blog profile.

THIS GIVEAWAY IS OPEN TO US RESIDENTS ONLY!

The additional entries will give you one extra for each one.

Subscribe to my blog
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Follow me on Twitter @sheilacakes7 and tweet about this giveaway with the link. Leave your twitter name in your comment. (You can earn 3 entries daily total for tweeting)
Tell me about a time when you would need Binaca. Be creative!

I will Email the 5 lucky winners and they will have 48 hours to contact me or I will have to redraw the winners that don’t respond.

This giveaway will end August 31, 2009 at 11:59 pm EDT.

GOOD LUCK EVERYONE!!