National Healthcare Decisions Day: Taking the Time to Plan
Tips on How to Begin Necessary Conversations with Loved Ones about Their End of Life Care Wishes
By Dr. James Mittelberger
April
16 is National Healthcare Decisions Day – A day set aside to
encourage all of us to discuss important advance planning end of life
health care wishes. It’s an opportunity to begin the process of
documenting those wishes before a stressful health crisis arises.
It can be tough to get started. It may even feel a bit awkward, but powerful conversations with family members today can assure
end-of-life preferences are honored and reduce stress and uncertainty
in the future. Planning today can help ensure that your loved ones will
receive the treatments they want, and avoid the care that they don’t
want at the end of life.
According
to a national survey by The Conversation Project, more than 90% of the
people think it’s important to talk about their loved ones’ and their
own wishes for end-of-life care, but fewer than 30% of people have
actually had the conversation. Many people simply haven’t gotten
around to taking the necessary steps to crystallize what they want and
to formalize it. Sometimes it’s because people don’t know how to start
the conversation with their loved ones.
A
great way to start is by thinking about what is most important to you
if you or your loved ones were facing a life threatening or progressive
illness. You would start planning and reflecting on what you and your
loved ones would want, expressing those desires and having the
thoughtful conversation. After all, no one wants to be scrambling for paperwork, evaluating care choices or putting their families through uncertainty.
Here are simple steps to begin the conversation and planning for important end of life health care decisions:
· Start with your loved ones. Honest
communication can help families avoid the stress of guessing what a
family member would have wanted. You may find that you and your loved
ones may see some things differently. That’s okay. Be open with each
other and focus on really understanding the views of those you love.
· Think about what is most important to you.
What are your greatest fears, hopes and goals? Who would you prefer to
make decisions on your behalf with your physicians if you could not? How
sure are you of your choices? Do you want your chosen proxy to have
leeway to change your decisions? Discuss these topics with your loved
ones to reach a shared understanding of your desires.
· Make it official.
Once you’ve had the conversation, formalize your decisions by putting
them in writing. There are several ways. An advance directive can help
describe your medical wishes when you no longer can. Special medical
orders can be developed with your doctor. Finally, a health care proxy
identifies your health care agent—the person you trust to act on your
behalf if you are unable to make decisions or communicate your wishes.
· Get help.
You can find valuable resources to help you think through these issues
and make decisions more manageable at theconversationproject.org and
agingwithdignity.org.
This
is something that takes time, but well worth it. I have seen firsthand
the sense of peace, calm and satisfaction families experience knowing
their loved ones wishes are granted giving you more precious and
memorable time to spend with your loving family member.
Dr.
James Mittelberger, is Chief Medical Officer of Optum Palliative and
Hospice Care, who is board-certified in Internal Medicine, Geriatrics,
Hospice and Palliative Medicine
Click to listen to Dr. Mittelberger's interview: National Healthcare Decisions Day (12 minute interview)
