The Internet can be a Very Scary Place

I have been on the Internet since I was in the 5th grade. I am 31 now so it was pretty new back then. I started out on Prodigy when it was just message boards. Looking back now I realized that I was a possible victim of solicitation of a minor. I remember  when I was on Prodigy, a guy asked me what my bra size was. I had no clue I was a naive kid. I said 50. No letter just 50. When I got AOL in the 7th grade I started going in to chat rooms. These were just town square rooms. I was 13. I would talk to these guys who I thought liked me. I felt special because they were like 17. I remember one in particular who was 17 or 18 could have been older. He told me that he had a sister my  age and I chatted with her. I never questioned if she was real or him on a screen name. I just thought it was so cool that this guy was talking to me. I am sure that is a common feeling for girls that age. He lived in Lakeland Florida and I lived in the suburbs in a nice community in Indiana.

There were other guys that would talk to me, some not so appropriately.  They weren't totally vulgar but more sneakily vulgar. There was definitely grooming going on too. That's basically where they get you to trust them and are really nice to you. The good thing is that they were all over the country and I wasn't stupid enough to send pictures of my body. Even good girls can be fooled. It is so important to monitor your children online. I hate to say it but trust is not enough. You can trust your child but you can't trust the other person. It doesn't matter what the kid says it could be all a lie. Pictures don't mean anything. Anyone can pretend to look like someone online. Teach your children when it comes to people online to trust no one.  I don't care if they are nice. It doesn't matter if they are cute. You don't talk to strangers when they offer you candy. You don't have private convos with strangers online. Even if they say they are a nun.

It really concerns me because even though we know more about online predators and pedophiles, with social media and everyone feeling the need to share every location and thing they are doing, it's really harmful. I see that kids have Facebook and Twitter who shouldn't. People are posting their private business with the masses. I think that Facebook and Twitter should tighten up their age requirement. Facebook and Twitter should require an actual way to verify age. Parents need to install monitoring software. This is not a trust issue. It is not a oh my kid is a good kid and wouldn't do that issue. It's a safety measure. If your perfect little angel becomes a victim of an Internet crime including bullying. You need a record. You need to be able to know who these people are in case there is something that needs your attention. If your child decides to meet someone online you need to know who this person is just in case. Some kind of contact number or an ip. Just having your computer in an open space isn't enough you can't watch them like a hawk all the time.

Your child probably will be mad if you monitor them with software. They may question if you trust them. You might have an argument over it. It's not a trust issue it's for their safety and when they are a parent they will understand and probably thank you. They will look back and think wow I really was fearless and did a lot of stupid things. Just as I did. I was totally fearless. I was a good polite kid and I did a lot of stupid stuff that people probably thought I wouldn't do. I thought I was invincible and nothing could hurt me.

Cyber Safety Tips

Everything we do these days is on computers; we get a great deal of our information from the internet. Growing up we were one of the few families that had the internet I knew of. I remember being in the basement when I was in 5th grade sitting on the internet message boards, back before chat rooms, talking to strangers about different things. Not everything I came across was appropriate for my age but I was naïve and I didn’t even know what they were talking about. It wasn’t really crude but it was like what is your bra size. I was definitely not sure how to answer it. The internet was newer back then, there wasn’t as many things going on as there is now.

I think that it is important to teach your children about cybersafety. I think it is as important as teaching them not to talk to strangers in real life. I think that the internet is a very valuable tool if it is used properly. I thought I would share with you some tips I have learned throughout the years of being on the internet and keeping our kids safe. As you all know I am big on safety and protecting kids from the dangers in the world.

Tip #1 Place your computer in a common area so you can know what is going on at all times with your child. That is really important to know who your child is talking to.

Tip #2 Teach your children to not talk to strangers online no matter how nice they sound. Kids are extremely trusting and it is important that you limit their buddy lists, friends lists etc, and NEVER meet someone they talk to on the internet.

Tip #3 Use Parental Controls and monitor what your kids do online. Some people would think that is invading their child’s privacy but I feel that the internet is a privilege that needs to be earned.

Tip #4 Be open with your child about the internet. If they seem to become upset or withdrawn after spending time on the computer, make it a point to find out what happen. They could be the victim of cyber bullying or have some other problem going on.

I think with these 4 tips you can make the internet a safer place for your children. There are many wonderful websites out there where you can learn anything at your fingertips. Just think of all the libraries you would have to visit to have the access to all the knowledge of the internet. I hope you all share these tips with your family and if you have any to add please comment.

Unknown Dangers of YouTube

Almost everybody has heard of YouTube. Even kids have gone to YouTube and looked at videos. I know this first hand because I have observed them doing it. Not my son of course he is way too young to figure out what it is. There are a lot of disturbing things on there. I started thinking about the Gummy Bear video I was forced to watch 50 times in a row this summer and since I am bored I went to YouTube like I had done a million times before and proceeded to watch it. The video is kind of silly with a Gummy Bear singing with its little booty hanging out a little at the top. OK no big deal I guess. I made it half way through the song and I got annoyed really quickly. Then I remembered about the Hampster Dance phase and listening to Crazy Frog with an old friend and her kids. I thought I hadn’t heard The Hampster Dance in a coon’s age so I was like what the heck. So I searched it on You Tube and I was disgusted by what I saw.

Parents, please be sure you are 100% aware of what your children are watching and doing on the internet. Parental controls are great but there will be stuff that slips through the cracks. You could be like oh Junior looked at The Hampster Dance on YouTube, no big deal.

I typed in the words Hampster Dance in YouTube’s search and the THIRD video on the first page is a video of a man in his 20’s or 30’s wearing a fanny pack dancing to Techno Music. He gets naked. You can’t see any actual parts but you can see it wiggling through his underwear. They do close ups on this too. Then he gets completely naked, well he is wearing just a fanny pack and watches a real hamster dance. I repeat this is the third video listed from the top on the first page for hamster dance.

So, please be fully aware of what your children, grandchildren etc, are looking at by supervising them at all times. If you think that they will get on the computer while you sleep, password protect it and hide the cords and the keyboards. The internet can be a very scary place for children and teens.

Why buy something when you can get it for free?

I find most books really helpful with learning new things. There are books on practically everything. I think books are important but I also think that the internet is a valuable tool as well. You have millions of different types of information at your fingertips. Of course I still love books and the internet doesn’t replace them by any means but I don’t know how people will write books about stuff that you can search online for free, especially when it comes to frugal tips. These little tidbits can be found for free by typing in frugal tips or tips on making your own baby wipes in the search engine of choice. Who needs to pay 10 to 12 dollars for a book that is essentially many other people’s ideas that you wrote down and claimed as your own? I don’t think it is right to make a buck off of other people’s ideas without giving them a cut. In my opinion, I believe it is wrong.

I have lots of respect for those authors that come up with their own content and do their own research. Those are the books you should be reading and buying. They are honest writers that put in a lot of hard work. I don’t think it is a good idea to buy such a book. It is the equivalence to me searching say Food Network’s website and writing a cookbook about it using their recipes. That example reminds me of an episode of Saved By the Bell where they start selling Screech’s Secret Sauce and they find out the recipe was from the Betsy Crocker cookbook. I am kind of shocked that the publisher even published it. It seems like it would be a law suit in the making in my opinion. Unfortunately, plagiarism is everywhere, even some of my blogging friends are getting their content stolen.

I was on Amazon earlier looking at books and I came across a book called, Instant Bargains: 600+ Ways to Shrink Your Grocery Bills and Eat Well for Less, I was reading through the description and the reviews and the book seems like it would be a total waste of money in my opinion as I said before, You can search the internet for anything. Instead of 600+ ways you could have 600,000 from the internet.

I personally think I will save my money and continue to search the internet for all things cheap. I guess my thinking is…If you are cheap why would you pay for something that is free? It kind of defeats the purpose in my opinion. If anyone wants to throw away their money please email me and pay pal it to me instead. I am sure I can put it to good use.

Anonymous comments welcome, blog trolls are not.

I am going to let you all in on something. You probably should already know this as it is common sense in my opinion but, the internet is not as anonymous as you think it is. When you go to a website someone somewhere can figure out who you are. Well, OK not exactly who you are but if it is someone the person knows of they can. It really is not hard to figure it out, especially if you have left a comment or visited before. They also can tell where you came from and where you visit and how long you stay on the site. How often you visit and what you do.

Leaving anonymous comments is perfectly fine but at the same time know that you are potentially only anonymous to others that visit. I am not saying I know who every person is but it is not too hard to figure out who a blog troll is. Part of the reason I get some of the opportunities I do have to do with my stats. I have to keep track of them somehow. Makes sense right?

I got my first nasty comment on my blog Thursday night. It was on my compassion post. I had never received anything negative on my blog. Besides the occasional spam comment which everyone gets. I don’t really get bothered by spam. It is just a couple clicks and your comment about flowers in India or your foreign symbols are gone. I don’t know the difference between Chinese and Japanese symbols so I can’t say for sure what it is. Everyone up to Thursday night has been really supportive and nice on my blog. It really was rude. Of course curiosity got the best of me and I had an idea of who this blog troll was.

So I looked at my comments and the website I use and figured it out within moments. I have great investigative skills comparable to Monk or Sherlock Holmes. My hunch was right and I decided not to allow the comment to go through because it is my blog and my space and I choose not to litter it up with negativity. It wasn’t that the person had a different opinion than I do. It was the simple fact that the comment was an intentional attack. It was someone who had never been to my blog, at least I don’t think they had. It was a personal attack and while I understand and embrace that people think differently, I won’t let people maliciously attack me or my readers or friends. I am not saying you have to agree with everything I say; just if you decide to leave a comment do so respectfully. I want my readers to feel safe on my blog and know that I don’t tolerate trolls and mean spirited comments.

So, thank you to all my readers that are supportive and kind.