Twitter Convo about God

I was having a conversation with a friend on Twitter about God.  We were talking about churches and God and religion.  She and I have both had bad church experiences.  I went to a Wesleyan church when I was 17 and it was a total nightmare.  I felt so alone, the people were really mean, and it just wasn’t what I thought that church was.  It was not a good environment. It was like if you didn’t fit their exact image and thought the exact same way you were a leper.  I was always taught that you are supposed to love someone as Christ loves us.  I am not going to say I was perfect, because that would be a lie, no one is.  I am still not perfect because I am human, but I was lost.  I was a 17 year old girl lost, trying to seek out God.  I have always believed in God but I wasn’t sure of the answers I was seeking.  I was raised Catholic.  I went to a church looking for guidance and I was totally metaphorically stoned.  I know that I messed up some, but I owned up to it. 

What really bothered me was this youth group I joined would judge me for things and turn around and do the same things.  It was a very upsetting thing to go through.  I wasn’t acting like a maniac or anything; I was just different, trying to find where I belonged.  I had serious issues with the youth pastor sharing my confidential information like it was the weather.   I would go to church and the youth group meetings and I was invisible.  I could have been on fire and no one would have cared.  It was just a horrible thing.  I am so glad that I didn’t decide to base my opinions of God and Christians from this group of people.  If I had, I would be so lost and so wrong.  I have a really strong faith.  I guess I could kind of credit it to what I once referred to as a cult, to my relationship with God. It definitely made me realize that there are bad people in every religion and also good.

After that experience, I taught Sunday school at a Methodist Church.  It was a lot of fun.  I decided somewhere between after those experiences that I should be non-denominational Christian.  I think that there should only be God’s laws and not man’s. I loved the church I went to when I was married because it was totally God driven.  The Lord was totally in charge of the sermons and the things we took part in. It was an awesome thing.  I miss it so much still to this day.

My friend and I were talking about how sometimes churches are similar to MLM or Multi-Level Marketing. I totally agree because when I was at the church I went to when I was married and actually married in was totally not about donations. It was about God, and helping the community.  The church was really small as I know I have said before.  Money didn’t matter at all at this church was awesome.  It was just that we all knew God would provide.  The burden was placed in God’s hands and he provided what the church needed every time.  You have to surrender things and let God handle it.  It is hard to do  I know. I struggle with it daily. 

Something my friend and I talked about is people being preachy. There is a fine line between being excited and cramming it down someone’s throat.  I don’t usually bring up God to my friends. I am not ashamed of God or anything I just don’t want them to feel forced in to believing the same thing as me.  I am firm believer in the fact that it is a choice only you can make. I don’t think that God loves someone any less if they decide it is not right for them.  If my friends bring it up. I love talking about it.  I have never read the whole Bible so I can’t quote scripture but  I am pretty good at saying the right thing so my friends say.

I came up with an awesome analogy on Twitter the night we were talking about this.

I believe in planting seeds, watering them, waiting for them to grow, vs throwing a plant in a pot and having them not flourish.

That basically means you need to take the time to answer questions, pray for and really spend time talking about God with someone who is interested in learning more.

You have to give some TLC as you would to a newly planted seed.  Noah and I planted some zinnias last year from seeds, and they grew to be taller than he was.  Sure it took longer but they were flourishing like crazy. 

If you take a plant and throw it in a pot, the plant will not flourish, you can’t force it to grow and it doesn’t really wanna be in the pot any way.  It feels trapped in the pot.  It can’t spread or grow properly.    You can’t make someone believe in God, no matter how hard you try or want it for them.

You have to start from scratch and it has to be something someone wants you can water the plant as much as you want but it is up to the flower to blossom.

Insecurities

We all have our insecurities in life, in love and in ourselves.  I think that being insecure about ourselves make us human. If no one was insecure, it would mean that everyone was perfect, in that area of life. I am insecure; I have my reasons, just as you have yours.  My insecurities are a part of who I am, whenever I try really hard not to be insecure, it always proves that I was right and those are reasons to  be insecure, I know that I am a good person. I try to be a good person, but really after all I have been through, I am not sure why I remain that way.  I guess that is just who I am.  I don’t really like being insecure, but sometimes if you hear something long enough you start to believe it.  You know your shortcomings and your flaws in yourself.  You see flaws in others, but everyone in the end is not perfect.  So what if someone has issues, there has to be a reason for them. They don’t just wake up one morning and say I’m going to be insecure today.  I have had my flaws pointed out to me; of course I already knew what they were. I don’t think that you need to tell someone, something that is obvious to them. They know and they hurt over it. I know that I am far from perfect. I have never pretended that I am. I make mistakes often. I do things and say things I probably shouldn’t do.  I am human after all.

I love my friends because they can look past my flaws and I look past theirs and we love each other for who we are!

Faith and Relationships

I am kind of nervous writing this post.  I am not too sure how it will be received.

I asked on Twitter one day, if it was wrong that I want to have a relationship with a man who has the same faith I do? I mean we don’t have to be exactly on the same page about absolutely everything, but I would want someone who has the same fundamental beliefs I do.  I hope that doesn’t seem judgmental or anything but God is a huge part of my life and I want to be able to share it with my someday husband.   I want to be able to pray with him, read the Bible together, have discussions, and worship together. I personally believe that people with different beliefs in a relationship can strain the relationship.   I think a solid relationship is based on a foundation and you have to have similar belief systems.  When I think about this subject two things come to mind.  The first one is a bible verse.  A cord of three strands is not quickly broken, if you are both wrapped around God your relationship is stronger.  Three is stronger than two strings that are just wrapped around each other.  This could be whatever you believe but for me it is God.

 The other thing I think of is an episode of Trading Spouses.  I think it is the only one I have ever watched and I have seen it twice.  The families are a Christian family and the other family is Orthodox Jewish, which means they are completely Kosher, they are very strict about dress and very old school with their beliefs.  When the Jewish mom is having dinner with the other family, she says it is important that her children marry someone who is also Orthodox Jewish. One of the family members said something along the lines of that’s judgmental.  The mother of the family agreed with the new mom and said it is important to have the same beliefs.   I have noticed people struggling with their relationships because they want to talk about their faith and the other person is not interested or even disrespectful about it.  It is ok that they don’t believe the same thing but I think that it is important to have that support system.

I have dated guys that don’t believe in God. I had some be rude about it and insult my faith. I never sat them down and tried to get them to believe in him. I respected their beliefs. I think it is easier when you have someone holding your hand and encouraging you to believe in your faith of choice and nurture it.  You definitely notice it more when you’re struggling in your faith without that support system.  It is in my opinion easier to get off the path you are on and be led astray.  I guess it is an accountability thing,  someone to keep you on track.

 Someone on Twitter responded it is important especially if you want kids down the road.  I totally agree. I am teaching Noah about God and Jesus.  His first DVD was God made Christmas. I love the God Made series. They are really cute DVDS.  I am not cramming it down his throat, he can make the choice when he is old enough to do so, but I want him to know about God.  We talk about God  together, pray together, he calls them God Blesses. It is important to me that he does. I want all my children to know about God.  I don’t want my future husband to derail my family’s beliefs.  I don’t want my children to hear that God isn’t real because he is.  I think that it becomes confusing for a child when they have parents that believe totally different things.  It becomes a struggle for the family and the child.  Things come together better when you are all together in faith and are able to grow in God (or whatever you believe in) as a family.