Showing posts with label Dating a single mom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dating a single mom. Show all posts

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Dating Single Mom Style

Being a single mom can be very hard. It of course has its advantages and disadvantages. The advantages are way more important than the disadvantages of course. When you are divorced with a child or a single mom you have the urge to want to date. I am only thirty one and I would love to have a bunch more children. Some moms decide not to date or have no desire to be in a relationship again, but I am not in that group. I am however not really in any rush to do so. I know my biological clock is ticking and for someone who wants many more children, it is a little unnerving. I am however a mom. That doesn't mean that my needs aren't important. It means my son's needs are most important.  I am actually pretty nervous about dating anyone. I have set two important rules however.

The first rule is I have to be very serious with a guy before they meet Noah. We will have to be together a long time. He is my life and I don't want him getting attached unless it is the real deal. I don't want to be someone who brings a lot of relationships around my son. I don't want to be like this is my friend so and so, unless they are just a friend. I don't want him to bond with some random person who he may or may not see again. It's too confusing and hard for him.

My second rule is and I won't tell Noah he has this power, but if Noah doesn't like the guy, I won't per sue things further. I don't ever want to be with someone my son doesn't like. I don't want to be under the impression that things will get better and he will eventually like the guy. Kids are great judge of character, in my opinion. I am really  good at reading Noah and I know the difference between when he is genuine and when he is just being a grump.

I am nervous about dating someone because you never know who they are. I will totally Google the heck out of you, search court records, and find out whatever I can about the guy, before the first date. I  am not paranoid or crazy, but I don't live in some fairy tale world that thinks that bad people don't exist. I know that they do unfortunately. I will be well informed about who this person is. I will also trust my gut and know that if I feels like something isn't right, then it probably isn't. Women's intuition is important.

I am not really in any hurry. I definitely don't want to rush anything. I am fine with meeting someone and just talking for a long time before anything happens. I am more in to taking the time to making the right decision and going slow.  I want to make sure it is worth it vs. just jumping in and taking the risk and seeing what happens.  It's funny how when you are a parent, you change your thinking about everything.

When you are ready to meet a guy you should dress up nicely and don't forget to accessorize.