My Cousin Alex

As some of you may know, I have family in England. My dad lives there and so do my aunt and cousin. I haven't seen my cousin Alex in many years which sucks because we used to be really close before they moved to England. The last time I saw him he  was not an adult yet. He used to talk about wanting to drink beer, of course he wasn't allowed to. I wonder how he is doing? Some day I want to make the trip across the pond and see my family. It would be so cool to be in a new country and experience all the culture. I would probably call up my cousin Alex and meet up with him and go to some london bars and have a drink to catch up and talk about old times. I wonder how bars in London differ from American bars? I am sure there are some slight differences. I believe the drinking age is younger than in the United States. I think it would be odd to see younger adults in a bar drinking when I am so used to the drinking age being twenty one. It was kind of like when I first saw a child in a liquor store in Florida. In Indiana you have to be twenty one to even enter one. It's funny how you get used to things, it would be culture shock.

I would love to see Alex though. There is something about family that only family members can understand. We would probably laugh so hard together and remember all the crazy things we used to do. We used to play with his neighbors and make our own mad libs. We also would have tea parties with lots of yummy treats.  We had some great times together and I miss him a lot. I wonder if he has a British accent now. I am very curious to see how he's grown up. I know it won't be the same as when we were kids, we both have probably changed a lot as we have gotten older. I hope that we are still able to be close and not two strangers that happen to share the same grandparents.

Have you ever been to London? Do you have any bar recommendations?

Family is Family...No Matter What

To me, family is family. I don’t care if you are my cousin or my fifth cousin. You are still my family. I am kind of confused about something.  Let’s say you have an aunt that gets remarried to a man but who has a child with her first husband.  Who is your uncle, would the first person become your ex uncle?  It is really confusing to me. I think that they are both your uncle, because one is my cousin’s father and the other is my aunt’s husband. I would consider my cousin’s dad more of my uncle because they are my cousin’s dad. Yeah I just confused myself too.  Of course most of the time the ex-husband or ex-wife are the ones that are usually the ones that don’t come to family functions because that could be kind of awkward.  I know I will never go to a family function for my ex’s family and that is fine with me. But, then I am thinking about who are these people. I mean are you really supposed to forget that you spent a huge chunk of your life with those people.  I understand when you divorce someone you divorce their family in a sense. Those bonds are forced to be broken.   It is a fact of life. It is just something that is understood.  I personally think that it sucks. I was really close to my ex-husband’s aunt.  I often think about her, if she is doing well. She has a horrible disease and I loved her, I still do.  I know that I will never have a hug from her, and that makes me want to cry.

I still consider those exes who are the parents of my cousins as my aunts and uncles.  I am just odd I guess.  I still love them.  One of them I used to see all the time at family things.  My family is different though. We are the type of family that would accept you if you were legally a member or not.  I love that about us.  I try to include them if I can.  I think that life is too short, to exclude others.  I love whole heartedly. I can’t just forget about someone like they never existed.  When my Grandma Rose passed away, my cousin’s ex-wife came to the funeral.  I could tell she felt kind of out of place when she went around hugging everyone in my family. She said I’m sorry for your loss, and I replied I am sorry about yours too.  I knew that she spent a lot of time with my grandma, my grandma loved her.  I think that I took her by surprise when I said that. I truly feel that it was her loss as well.  My aunt Mary came to the funeral as well.  She was married to my uncle before he passed away; I hadn’t seen her probably since my uncle’s funeral.  That wasn’t really weird for me either. I knew my grandma loved her too.  Family is so weird sometimes. 

Then I think about those who you call aunt and uncle who aren’t even related to at all.  Those are usually your parents’ friends that you have known for almost or all your life. It is more an honorary title. Then you have your godparents if you are catholic. Even though, it seems like everyone has godparents these days, catholic or not.  You have sisters and brothers that are not even related to you but you just love them that much and you become so close that the barrier of friends and family gets broken down and you are just family. Those are the best kind of friends to have.  I love my friends unconditionally as I do my family.  I love what Gibbs on NCIS said a few weeks ago about family. He said Family is more than just DNA it’s about people who care and take care of each other. I agree whole heartedly.  It truly is not about DNA or marriage or anything but just that, people who care and take care of each other.  I just can’t turn my back on people who I have cared about in the past. I just can’t. It is not who I am, it is not how I was raised. I am here for those, even if they were not there for me.  Someday you never know who might be there for you.

Aloha Friday

I know I have been seriously lacking on this meme.


My friend Kailani has a wonderful Friday meme called Aloha Fridays.
In Hawaii, Aloha Friday is the day that we take it easy and look forward to the weekend. So I thought that on Fridays I would take it easy on posting, too. Therefore, I’ll ask a simple question for you to answer. Nothing that requires a lengthy response.

I have been watching LA Ink. I started watching it back in 2008 occasionally but now I have been watching it every week the past couple months or so. I love listening to the stories behind the tattoos. It has made me respect them more. Although I still can't understand a lot of tattoos that people get like tweety bird and other iconic tattoos. I just think when you are 80 you are going to regret getting that tattoo of a devil on your hiney. No, I don't know anyone with a devil tattooed on their hiney.

So my question this week is... If you were to get a tattoo what would you get and why?

I would personally probably NEVER get one. It is way too permanent to me. If I were to get one I would get my Grandma Rose's senior picture in black and white with the words "I love you more" under it. As some of you know my grandma Rose has always meant the world to me and she always will. I have a feeling she wouldn't like it because I don't think she likes tattoos. My cousin has a really cool portrait of his dad on his arm with El Diablo under it. It's gorgeous work. So what about you?