My Most Embarrassing Mom Moment.

I shared with you my most embarrassing moment when I threw up all over the bus on a field trip in the ninth grade. Now I want to share with you my most embarrassing mom moment. As a parent we all have one or two or five depending on the child and the number of kids you have. It could be something like your child said something inappropriate to someone or that they did something silly. Mine however involves me. 

When Noah was 3 months old my cousin and her three kids were visiting. Noah had a dirty diaper and of course I wanted to change him right away. So, I took him to his changing table. I know what you are thinking, he peed on you. No that wasn't what happened. I started changing his diaper and he wasn't quite done yet so I quickly closed his diaper and waited for him to finish. After he was done, I changed him. I went back to my company and was sitting there talking to my cousin. I always play with my hair so I was running my fingers through it and all the sudden. I felt something on my hand. I looked at my hand and it was covered in poop. I had poop in my hair and on my hand. I gave my cousin Noah to hold while I washed my hair in the sink. Her kids thought it was the funniest thing ever. They told their dad on the phone. I was so embarrassed. Thankfully it was my family and I was at home. Could you imagine if I were at a restaurant or the store. 

What is your most embarrassing mom moment? 

Must Have Tips for Caregivers and Finding them too.

My Grandma Rose was an amazing woman. She always had heart problems. She had her first bypass surgery in 1979, and didn’t have another one for sixteen years. You are only supposed to go ten. She was very independent and strong. My grandpa passed away in 1993 and she lived alone for seven years.  She always had visitors, especially me.  We were best friends. I would go to visit her almost every other weekend, even when I was older.  We always had a great time.  I would go everywhere with her, even when she was an honorary pall bearer at a funeral for a fellow Catholic Daughter. Eventually she had Alzheimer’s disease, and could no longer live without someone around.  I moved in with her for a while to make sure she took her medicine, ate, and that she didn’t wander off. My aunt lived close by too, in case she needed anything.  It was very hard for everyone involved. It was hard because you have to watch someone you love deteriorate mentally.  We had become her caregivers. Genworth has a great article about how the caregiver’s lives are rerouted and all the changes you have to make.CNN reports a growing trend of people caring for aging parents or in this case, grandparents. I know that as one of the main caregivers, I wasn’t able to work outside of the home and I had to spend less time with friends. At the beginning I even moved away from everyone to be there for her.I knew that it was the most important thing for me to do at the time.

She was in an assisted living place for a while; we had some concerns about other residents being rough with my grandma. We took her out of there. We heard on the news a woman in her unit was able to escape and froze to death in their courtyard.  This was after she moved in with us. We continued to take care of her; I would make sure she had whatever she needed while my mom was at work. It was a full time job. I didn’t mind because this was my best friend and she took care of me when I was little. We kept her with us as long as we could until her health started to deteriorate, and she needed to be in a nursing home. No one in our family had medical training, and was such a hard decision. We visited her and took her out all the time; she was only fifteen minutes away from us.  At this point it was extremely hard; we would bring her over for holidays and she wouldn’t know who we were or where she was.  In 2005, she had congestive heart failure and just was her time to go.  We all received a gift the last few days, she was able to remember everyone and tell them things only she would know to say.  I would do it all over again if I could just see her and give her a million hugs. I think about her every single day.

Being a caregiver is hard work but it is worth it.  My family took care of my grandma for years. It was definitely a group effort.  You really need a great support system.  I am thankful that everyone was there and could help in some way.  Sometimes, family care isn’t an option, it is very important to find someone qualified to take care of your loved one.  It is tough to know what to look for. There are tools and articles from companies like Genworth that can help you find out more information.  I would recommend researching the caregiver or the facility.  Make sure they are licensed. I know that you can usually find health department records and see if they have had any violations. If they aren’t online, you can call the health department and ask them as the records are public. Look for reviews of the facility. Use search engines and learn as much as you can about the caregiver or facility. If you are using an in home caregiver, have them do a criminal background check and drug tests.  Many states have online court records, if they are available, search court records.  Again it is public records.  By searching court records you get things that may not be criminal but could raise a red flag. I know I wouldn’t want someone who has been sued a lot to be responsible for my loved one.  

Thankfully Genworth has a tool that can help you find caregivers in your area, so you can avoid Craigslist to find a caregiver.

Stay away from places like Craigslist when looking.  I am leery about a total stranger taking care of a family member that answers an online advertisement. Who knows if they know what they are doing or properly trained? I would try and find an agency that has well trained, professional workers that are really passionate about taking care of people.  I hope these tips help you if you ever need a caregiver for a loved one.

This post was inspired by Genworth and Brandfluential. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

Last Weekend was Amazingly Fun

Noah and I like to do fun things together on the weekends. We do fun things everyday but those are more around our home.  This past weekend we went to a Pioneer place. They were having a BBQ competition.  Now we weren’t really in to the whole food aspect of it. We did however have a lot of fun.  We went on a hayride. It was Noah’s first one. We always talked about going to the pumpkin patch but that never happened.  So, Noah was unsure about a hay ride. He told me he didn’t want to do it. He wouldn’t like it, but tough cookies kiddo. We were going. Well, the moment he saw the tractor pulling the wagon, he was so excited. He loved every moment, minus the screaming kids, without supervision.  We also fed some chickens. We grounded the corn ourselves, and I realized that I needed to work out. It was so tough trying to turn the wheel, but I figured it out.  No starving chickens on my watch.  After the hayride and feeding the chickens, who had laid an egg, we went to do other things. We made candles.  I used to love to make candles so it was extra exciting for me.  I admit I was nervous about Noah and hot wax.  He did a great job though.  His candle is awesome.  I had so much fun.  We also made homemade butter. It is so easy to do.  It was the best butter I had ever tried.  I had used a butter churn at Conner Prairie before but this was so much more fun.  I will be posting articles how to make both very soon. 

We also enjoyed hot dogs and sno-cones.  We came home and later went to the beach.  It was a beautiful day and the water was fun. There were some waves but not the wipe out variety.  I was so nervous because my boy had no fear. I was so worried that he would wipe out, like I used to do.  No one wiped out.  We also made a tidal pool. It started out as my foot spa, and then Noah took over.  I told him we should dig to China. He told me that is not possible. So I changed it to digging for buried treasure.  I didn’t find anything though. I also had a chance to be in the water all by myself. Sometimes you need that break in something absolutely beautiful to recharge. I spent a lot of time thinking about things and relaxing. We had a great day.  It was almost perfect.

What do you have planned for this weekend?

Watching Old Movies

As you probably know I am a huge movie junkie. My mom isn't really in to watching movies. I have been able to coax her in to watching an occasional movie with me. Most Saturday nights we watch Law and Order on Netflix. We went to the library and I checked out some DVDs to watch. I asked my mom if she wanted to watch Strangers on a Train with me. She agreed. We have watched a couple other black and white movies together. I have wanted to watch Strangers on a Train since I saw an episode of NCIS where DiNozzo talks about it. I of course mentioned it to my mom.

We watched it and it was a great movie. I admittedly was a little scared. We decided we would watch all the Hitchcock movies we could together. Aunt Clara from Bewitched is in it. So is Alfred Hitchcock's daughter, who I decided is a red head. For some reason both my mom and I were both laughing uncontrollably during the most intense scene in the movie. I couldn't stop. I was laughing so hard I was bawling. I also snorted a few times I am sure. I really needed to laugh and for some reason we picked the climax to do so.

After the movie, I turned on NCIS and it was the episode where they talk about Strangers on a Train. I thought that was pretty weird.

Do you like black and white movies? Have you seen Strangers on a Train? What did you think of it?

The Christmas Web Spring Sale

Christmas is probably my favorite holiday. I love everything about it, especially decorating the tree and the house. I go all out when I decorate. I put out things I had when I was young.  The two white Bears always come out. I also put out different Santas and my Lambchop  Angel.  Christmas would not be Christmas without them.  I am always looking for new decorations and ornaments. This past Christmas Noah made me a hand print wreath that I told him would go up every year. He also made my mom a Happy Holidays rug that will be out too. I know that it is spring and Christmas is merely a memory now, but it is never too early to be thinking about next Christmas.  I pick up stuff for Christmas all year long. While I don’t have my tree up anymore or the wreath on my door, I still like to hunt for things to add to my collection. When we went on the Disney Cruise, I bought my mom an ornament made out of shells and that was in September. We went to the Shell Show again this year and almost bought some ornaments.  

 I really enjoy buying things from specialty stores for Christmas vs. big name stores. I feel like specialty stores really know what they are doing and you can find unique items that aren’t available at like Walmart.   I am looking for quality stuff because I know that I will be using for many years. I am also really big on traditions.  Every year we have always made certain goodies for Christmas.  I now make the same recipes with Noah. I have a recipe that was in a magazine in 1982.  We also always read The Night Before Christmas. I love our traditions but I am looking for new traditions to start too.  I learned about an awesome tradition called The Christmas Web- A Family Tradition.  They were only able to ship in Birmingham Alabama in 2012 but now are able to ship nationally.  The Christmas Web is having a Spring Sale in honor of this exciting news!   

The Magic Wand that is spun by the Elves at the North Pole to spin a web of Christmas Cheer. I can see Noah now, trying to fish for elves on Christmas morning.  It is a really cool concept. It has 70 yards of yarn to lead you to that special gift that you really want.  Like I said before Noah loves to fish so I can see him pretending to fish for his present or have me “fish” for mine.  You can buy The Magic Wand for $10.99

 The Christmas Web offers two different products that I have never heard of.  The Christmas Web also sells a gift set. This would be great for families with more than one child because it comes with three wands.  It also comes with a 52 page hardcover book that tells you and your children how the Christmas Web was created.  You can also access a special website where you can get updates from Santa and your elves all year long.  I think that Noah would like the gift set because he can know why he has The Magic Wand and what powers it has.  I am sure he would read the book over and over.   The gift set is $39.99.

 You can order both items from The Christmas Web. If you use the code SALE in the promo code box you can save 25% of your order.

Check them out and lets all make some new Christmas traditions that can be passed on for generations to come.

Creative Popcorn Toppings

We love to eat popcorn in my house. Thanks to Publix we always have some because of the buy one get one free sales they have. I don't always like just butter popcorn, even the movie theater butter microwave kind. I usually add something to it. The only time I really want butter popcorn is at the movies because I always get extra extra butter. I don't really go to the movies often.

Here are some of my creative popcorn toppings I have discovered through the years.

Parmesan cheese popcorn

You can use either the sprinkles or the shreds. I use both. It just depends because Noah likes the sprinkle kind. The shredded kind gets a little crunchy but its so good.

Jalapeño Popcorn

This is something I learned in Texas with my cousins and her kids. We went to the movies and they put jalapeños on their popcorn. I tried it with just the juice because I wasn't in to Jalapeños. Now I love them so I just throw them on top too.

Homemade Garlic Popcorn

I totally love garlic popcorn but I can't eat it very often because my stomach hurts after, but it's definitely worth it.

Popcorn and icing

This is something I used to do with my Grandma Rose. She had heart problems and was on a special diet and so she had an air popper. The popcorn was pretty bland so I would dip it in chocolate icing. It was surprisingly good.

Chili powder on popcorn is not good. I really like chili powder but never on popcorn.

How do you like to eat popcorn?

Summer Concert Memories

One of the things I used to enjoy was going to concerts. I don't really go to them anymore because I am a mom and well it is hard to get away to go to one. I remember my first concert, it was The Cranberries when I was in the seventh grade. My sister's first concert was New Kids on the Block, I think. I could be wrong. I was never in to New Kids on the Block so I am not so excited as everyone else is about the reunion concert. When I was in high school, every summer my dad would take my sister and I to see Steve Miller at Deer Creek. I looked forward to it each summer because it was something special my dad shared with us, the love of music. We also went to other concerts at fairs, but Steve Miller was always my favorite. I was pretty naive when I was younger and I didn't realize what the other people at the concert were doing. I thought that they all just had really bad body odor. I remember asking later why it smelled so bad, and I was told why.

The last concert I went to was Lynyrd Skynyrd. It was a long time ago. It was literally spur of the moment as things often were before I was a mom. We hadn't gone through a big ticket shop to get our tickets. We fought through traffic which was completely backed up. We got to the concert not even knowing if we would get tickets. There were a ton of people who wanted to see Lynyrd Skynyrd too. After standing there for what seemed like hours, a friend was able to get us tickets. The concert was awesome. Everyone was singing a long and having a great time. When you go to a concert lawn seats are the way to go, but they only had pavilion so it was kind of crunched. I remember bawling at the first notes of Tuesday's Gone.  I felt like a total weirdo but it made me remember my miscarriage.

I would love to take Noah to concerts when he gets older. He loves music, especially Rock n Roll. I think it would be fun to make those memories with my son, just as my dad did with me.

My Cousin Alex

As some of you may know, I have family in England. My dad lives there and so do my aunt and cousin. I haven't seen my cousin Alex in many years which sucks because we used to be really close before they moved to England. The last time I saw him he  was not an adult yet. He used to talk about wanting to drink beer, of course he wasn't allowed to. I wonder how he is doing? Some day I want to make the trip across the pond and see my family. It would be so cool to be in a new country and experience all the culture. I would probably call up my cousin Alex and meet up with him and go to some london bars and have a drink to catch up and talk about old times. I wonder how bars in London differ from American bars? I am sure there are some slight differences. I believe the drinking age is younger than in the United States. I think it would be odd to see younger adults in a bar drinking when I am so used to the drinking age being twenty one. It was kind of like when I first saw a child in a liquor store in Florida. In Indiana you have to be twenty one to even enter one. It's funny how you get used to things, it would be culture shock.

I would love to see Alex though. There is something about family that only family members can understand. We would probably laugh so hard together and remember all the crazy things we used to do. We used to play with his neighbors and make our own mad libs. We also would have tea parties with lots of yummy treats.  We had some great times together and I miss him a lot. I wonder if he has a British accent now. I am very curious to see how he's grown up. I know it won't be the same as when we were kids, we both have probably changed a lot as we have gotten older. I hope that we are still able to be close and not two strangers that happen to share the same grandparents.

Have you ever been to London? Do you have any bar recommendations?

An Awesome Mudwalk Find!

We like to go on beach walks and pier walks. When the tide is really low, we go on mud walks. Mud walks are great for shelling. We all collect shells as I am sure you know. Well, my mom found a dead seastar recently.  She brought it home to show us and to dry out.  We have some small starfish but nothing like this. I bought a really cool starfish in The Bahamas, but my mom found this. We had put it in the bathtub for the time being. It was beautiful. It was completely perfect when it came inside.  I noticed that the tips of its legs were falling off. I thought that Noah was messing with it.  It was no longer whole but it was still really cool.

Several hours later, we touched it and its legs started moving a little. We weren’t sure if it was a reflex or something. We have a rule in our house that we don’t keep anything that is alive, or has a creature living in it, even if it is really cool. So, the seastar was put back in the water. Not before I took a few pictures though. It was kind of sad because it was such a rare find.  Noah even cried because he wanted to keep it. I explained why and he understood. It is one of the coolest things we have found to date.

The Birth of Social Media

Everyone is always joking about what we did before Facebook or social media. It has been a topic that is always brought up and surely due to our dependency of social media. I am a blogger so of course it is a huge part of my job. The real question is what did they do before social media? I am 31 so obviously I haven't always had social media or the Internet. So, what did people use? Sure there was regular mail and the phone but to share with everyone that would be a lot of time on the phone and many stamps. They had weekly dinners and would see people at the store or at the beauty parlor and around town, but that didn't reach everyone. I guess they spent a lot of time wondering where people were or did they?  Was there perhaps a "Facebook" before Facebook?

I often get bored and search things. I am constantly seeking to learn new things about anything I can. I have always been interested in family history and learning more about family. My grandma Rose wrote a complete family history of her dad’s family. I used to read it over and over. I loved to hear stories about my family. Family is really important to me. So, I decided to yet again Google my Grandma Rose's name, I am not sure why as there is never anything new. I ended up adding her city because there was another person who was dominating the search results.  I had found all the normal information about this person results, an article a distant relative wrote about our family history and even her obituary.  I also found something I had never seen before. A newspaper clipping that my Great Grandma wrote, thanking her children for taking care of her when she was sick. This was actually the newspaper. I kept looking through newspaper articles that I found and there were a ton about my family.  It wasn’t really news as in the traditional sense. It was like Mr. and Mrs. SoandSo had their children over for Sunday Dinner and Mrs. SoandSo is sick and was taken to the hospital and is now at home resting.  I really love those people that decided to scan in old newspapers so I could discover this really cool family history.

I thought it was really cool that I was reading about all of this. My grandma Rose always wrote things in datebooks. You could look at it and find out who called that day, who visited, who she called, what she did every day. I still like to look at them.  At first I thought, they must have no news in this town. I knew it was a really small town as I have visited them still having family living there.  I had to share this with my mom thinking how cool it was and how she would probably get a kick out of it. Then I realized, this was their Social Media. This was the way they communicated with each other in their town. This is how people in the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s did it. I obviously know that newspapers have been around for forever, but now you can’t find out that your neighbor had their family over for dinner or your neighbor’s granddaughter was a finalist for the National Merit Scholarship Award.  Those are the things we would write about on Facebook or tweet on Twitter.  They didn’t have the internet so they couldn’t just send an update instantly.  If they haven’t see Thelma in a while, they couldn’t have signed on Facebook and saw that Thelma was in the hospital. They would read about it in the paper.  The news in the paper wasn’t always about crime and politics and traditional news. It was about your neighbors’ news, the people that you shared your lives with daily, your friends, that was the most important news.

 In my opinion social media has been around a lot longer than you think, it just wasn’t digitalized until recently.

Sometimes You Just Have to Let Them Go.....

One of the hardest things is letting go. It is important to let go those that have hurt us repeatedly. Those people who do not have your best interest at heart, those that think of only themselves.  Unfortunately, I have a big heart. I say unfortunately because as I am aware it is a great thing, it is also a curse at the same time.  I look for the good in people as I have mentioned before, but sometimes you can’t find good in everyone. There are bad people in this world that want to hurt you, that don’t really care about you and it sucks.  Sometimes you just hit your complete breaking point and you have to just cut your losses, cut ties and hopefully learn something in the process.  Losing someone is never easy; you end up mourning the loss of a friendship or a loss of a relationship with a family member.  You go through a grieving period and it hurts. I will always care about those people, but my heart can’t take the pain that they caused. It is really hard for me to stop caring about someone.

 Sometimes I wonder if I gave too many chances, maybe I would see a difference, maybe they would change. The truth is you have to accept someone for who they are, not for what you see them to be. I really need to stop looking at a person’s potential and see them for what they really are. I guess I expect more in people, and when I find out I was wrong, I become disappointed in them.  I don’t expect much, I expect someone to be caring, compassionate, loving, and kind. It is so hard to know what kind of person someone is. You don’t want to push everyone away because people have hurt you in the past, but there is no way of really knowing.  It would be a lot easier if I had an eggdacator like in Willy Wonka, that would tell me if they were a bad egg or not.  If only I could line everyone up and have them step on the machine and see what happens.  If they were a bad egg, like Veruca Salt, down the garbage chute they would go.  I have learned there is not good in everyone. Something must have happened to make them this way.  Some people are just bitter jerks.  It has taken me a long time to learn this.

The worst feeling in the world is when you find out a family member is this way.  Especially when you have given your all to make things work, devoted so much time and energy to be there and when you find out who they really are, it is just like a slap in the face. Maybe I had hoped you changed, and it didn’t happen. There is just so much pain you can take before it eats you alive and you just can’t allow that person to hurt you anymore.  I guess you get to a point where the emotional pain is normal; it really messes with your other relationships and human dynamics.  Hope is a funny thing, it is good to have hope, but sometimes too much hope can distort your reality and make you hurt in the long run.  Some say you are in control of how you feel, and that you only allow someone make you feel a certain way, that is true, but there are a couple exceptions to the rules, one being when it comes to family. You spend your whole life looking up to someone, loving them, trying as hard as you can to have that relationship and bond with them and then one day you come to find out that they never cared and it was all a sham.  One of the quotes from Fools Rush In that I think about is “Love is a gift, not an obligation.” That basically means if it is a gift to love someone and be loved, not something you do because you have to.  I just feel like they were obligated and all those words and memories were a lie, because actions speak louder than words.

 I am not sure I can remember a time where I thought wow, he really loves me, I am sure there was one but it is just weird I can’t remember it.  I think that is the hardest truth to understand.  Now, it is time to let go of all of the pain and the hurt and the sorrow.  It’s time to live a happy life full of laughter and love, and put all that suffering behind me and leave those who have hurt me behind, no matter how hard that might be.  I am at peace with my decision, it probably is something I should have done a long time ago, but that little imp called Hope was playing a trick on me again. It’s good to hope, just don’t hope yourself in to a bad situation, see people for who they are, not what you potentially see in them, use caution and set a limit and once the limit exists be brave enough to just let them go.

I will instead of becoming a bitter person, and giving up hope on humanity, and losing my faith in those kind people, I will still take those chances and open my heart up; I will be a little more guarded about who I associate with.